Obviously had no intentions or sparks in writing anything here about anything thats going on.
Shula amazes me how she's just hanging on and doesnt cry since parents left. So mature. That to some extent encourages me.
Really happy how parents can just be together by themselves doing the call of God. wish I could go away like that too.
Lifes just passing by and it seems like I should be something so much more than just being with a toddler all days long, cleaning, cooking at times, seeing people go on about their lives.
Don't understand why I'm here at all, don't understand why I get a baby on my hands when I never lived anything like a slutty lifestyle, what did I do to deserve this single premature motherhood?
Why do the people with no vision, no dreams, no plans, no revelation get time, get opportunities, go on about almost thriving. But the ones who do have a vision, ideas, revelation, seem to be shut down.
Maybe I'm just plain wrong and I don't see anything ahead. Maybe i'm just too narrow in my thinking.
lately I've just been plain illogical and degraded, dont take anything from reading this.
